Tuesday, November 29, 2005

it was as if he lived inside her head .she "talked "to him all of the time.if she was wondering about what to wear for her aunt's big anniversary party she'd ask him for advice.

she wanted to take antihistamines an hour later,she'd tell him to remind her.

she'd even enact entire fights ,yes, complete with the screaming ,ranting ,raving and namecalling .and the tears ...

which is why,meeting him in person became, rather predictable.like watching repeat telecasts.

Sunday, November 27, 2005


the brackets remain and yet the commas have walked out.

ps:thank you sabi

Wednesday, November 16, 2005

she always felt like smoking ,after talking to him .
as if ,
talking was substitute.

Tuesday, November 08, 2005

she had become rather accident prone lately.

when they were talking on the phone ,setting up first date,she hurt her foot ...it bled and bloodied her bedsheet ,as she dreamt about him that night.
while engrossed in conversation ,during the date ,she had managed to break a glass and cut her thumb with it.there was spilt coffee and blood all over the pretty glass topped table.when she had gone to the loo to clean up the mess,she bled all over the floor, leaving big dramatic polka dots of red patterned on white tiles.

she cut herself again when the thumb finally healed.
blood came easy these days.

and now,he was gone ,and she was staring at her wrist thinking...she wanted more blood.

Monday, November 07, 2005


she had always thought herself to be rather generous.what she got,she shared.except now.
now ,...all those tiny bits of flattery ,she stores...like coins dropped into the piggy bank,sometimes taken out and counted ,but not spent.Or shared.
she was all saved up.For Tomorrow.

Thursday, November 03, 2005

all the tiny micro-organisms of envy inside me ,will procreate and multiply...and grow out of every pore of my skin ,
every thing thats covering me is slimy green .